Arsene Wenger says he’d like to become ‘immortal’ so he could remain Arsenal manager forever.
Setting himself up as a football management Connor MacLeod is a step into a brave new world for the Frenchman, because as everybody knows, there can be only one.
At some point he will sign a player called Juan Sánchez Villa-Lobos Ramírez and encounter a great foe, The Kurgan (possibly Jose Mourinho), until such time as The Quickening occurs.
Ok, so we’re making the assumption that Wenger would like to be this kind of ‘immortal’ as opposed to other forms of the undead. As a football addict, Vampirism wouldn’t suit him as many games take place in the daytime, not the ideal scenario when you melt in the sunshine. Nor do we see him as a shuffling zombie, feasting on brains.
At a stretch we could see him as a skeleton from a Scooby-Doo episode, but in the end they all turn out to be fakers who would have gotten away with it etc etc.
Speaking at his press conference today, the Arsenal manager responded to Stan Kroenke’s praise of him, and said, in a strange mix of a French-Scottish accent, “Honestly, I would love to be here forever because that would mean I would be immortal!
“I want it even more. I think the good thing about football is that it’s unpredictable and the next game is always a discovery and a new adventure and so you focus on that. All the rest is decoration.
“What is important is that you feel you can do your job where you are and I’m very grateful to this club because during the 17 years we’ve had ups and downs, but they have always shown a big faith in me and they always let me do the job like I thought it had to be done.
“If I’m still here today it’s because I got that consistent support from inside the club. I always thought that this club is special and in our job it’s important to know what you want and I rated the qualities that this club has always shown.”
At which point the press conference was broken up The Shpaniard before both men disappeared in a flash of lightning. We don’t know what it was but suspect it’s a kind of magic.10,930 views