Tuesday, August 19, 2014
West Ham made Vermaelen approach

West Ham made Vermaelen approach

Hilariously, West Ham manager Sam Allardyce revealed he’d made an approach to Arsenal to take Thomas Vermaelen on loan.

Quite why he thought Arsenal would allow the captain to go, given that we’ve only got three centre-halves at the club, is beyond us, but the Walrus is going to have to look elsewhere for defensive reinforcements.

“I think under the circumstances at Arsenal with the situation they’re in with the Champions League and cup matches, they’ve had to use Vermaelen as soon as any of the two defenders are injured,” he said.

“I don’t think there’s any chance we’ll get someone of his quality, but it would be nice if we could.”

I suppose there’s the whole thing of you never know if you don’t ask, but reports that Allardyce also asked Scarlett Johansson to marry him could not be confirmed this evening.



  1. Cute, Big Sam

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    • Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

      Poorly-rated Thumb up 6 Thumb down 108

  2. now THAT is optimistic

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  3. I’m sure Vermaelen was flattered;) On a serious note though, I really don’t want Verma to go under any circumstances.

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  4. Arsene's handkerchief


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    • In addition: AHHAAHAHHAahahhahaha

      but seriously though if Vermaelen left now, our depth would be…wafer fucking thin.

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  5. I think he is going for wrong player.. What he need is Park to score those 20 goals for him.

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    • He took Chamakh from us last year… as much as I hate the Walrus, you can’t wish too much misfortune on anybody.

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  6. Dream on Samuel.

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  7. that Scarlett Johansson line was priceless

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  8. What an idiot, may as well bid for Cahill while he’s at it

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  9. Baron Greenback foiled yet again!

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  10. Ah bless his cotton socks ha

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  11. Fat dreaming cunt

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  12. Even if i so badly want to kick a ball every now and then Fatcunt Sams dire westham is the last place i’d go to.

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  13. No shit.
    If Scarlett’s up for grabs she’d make one hell of a physio.

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  14. Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Poorly-rated Thumb up 7 Thumb down 81

  15. We already helped them last year when we loaned them Chamakh. Haha

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  16. “I think under the circumstances at Arsenal with the situation they’re in with the Champions League and cup matches, they’ve had to use Vermaelen as soon as any of the two defenders are injured.”

    That first half of that sentence is totally redundant. When a defender is injured, a reserve defender is used. Yes, Sam, we get it. This has nothing to do with our “situation” in cups. It’s just the meaning of a reserve player.

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  17. Hard luck Mr Big Sam. I heard Bale was on the bench last week so why not give that a go then.
    You deluded cunt

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  18. What an ignorant fat twap. To think the Arsenal club captain! would join those bunch? This is an insult to Vermaelens abilities. He’s not only too good for them, he’s too Arsenal-class to be Playing under a cunt.

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  19. Hahahahahaha! I can’t believe my eyes. Sam the dreamer!

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  20. Ozil is a goooooner

    Actually, fair play. Not Sam’s biggest fan by a long way but it does show a bit of intent from him to try and do it. Plus, to the outside, it probably does look like Verm is short of game time (hence why a loan could of been seen as beneficial).
    That being said, this sounds like something someone would coin up on Fifa… Not a chance in hell I’d let Verm leave.

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  21. He can have Diaby.

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    • No he can’t. Diaby might be a walking injury waiting to happen but he’s our walking injury waiting to happen and when he’s fit, he adds value to this team.

      And as long as he wears our crest I will fucking support him.

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      • Mickeroo- Well with that logic we’d still have players like Eboue still in the first team. If it wasn’t for a few thousand fans screaming their disapproval as he did his umpteenth clown impression, Wenger would still be professing his faith in Manu, and he’d still be losing games for us right now.

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    • I thought Diaby is out injured for the rest of the season, so a loan would be pointless, or am I am missing something?

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  22. I presume johnny heitenga was next on his rolodex

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  23. and I thought my jokes were bad

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  24. Sky is the limit Sam!

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  25. Splurge all your budget on one banjanxed striker while your squad screams out for reinforcements in all other areas and then when you hit bottom 3 panic and try to loan in the league leaders captain – genius “slow clap”

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  26. n/b Can’t believe we were once linked with Clint Dempshit…phew dodged a bullet there

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  27. When Walrus gets the sack soon, he can always get a job as a stand up comedian. Stupid cunt.

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  28. Every team dreams of getting arsenal players as always.

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  29. jabba the Hutt would have more chance coaxing Franco Baresi out of retirement.

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  30. He's got no hair but we don't care...


    Big fat-headed idiot.

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  31. So that’s Sam Allardyce, West Ham manager.
    The same West Ham that got their knickers in a twist just last week cos the Fulham manager spoke about a failed bid to sign Morrison.
    Apart from one being a loan and one an actual transfer, what’s the difference?

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  32. I wouldn’t loan him a fiver. Allarfyce, Pulis and Redknapp have got to be three Managers I dislike the most….Almost to the point of giving them concrete trainers, a plane trip, boot them out in tgevmiddle of the ocean and tell them to swim for the shore

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    • 2013-2014 = 2003-2004

      I am curious to also hear what you, sir, have to say about: John Terry, Ashley Cole, Robin Van Persie, Emanuel Adebayour, and Samir Nasri.

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  33. That’s a mockery of Thomas vamarlan

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  34. fucking idiotic dumb cunt my nutsack is a better manager than him

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  35. Nolan said he’s got west ham DNA

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  36. Far be it for me to defend Sam, but he’d did not actually.
    The interviewer asked him if he had made a loan offer and he said “no, Arsenal have too many games….we will not get someone of that quality” etc.
    Still, why let the truth get in the way of a good story eh?

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  37. Why mention Arsenal? @Gt

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  38. If he so badly needed reinforcement, why can’t he go and find it elsewhere why Arsenal?

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  39. Just can’t picture vermaelen anywhere near bubbles. Bubbles and Verm just wouldn’t work. Verm is most certainly not interested in bubbles. He can’t like bubbles, can he ?

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  40. Aim high Willis! Aim high!

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  41. Its not his fault….too much freedom of choice is bad.

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  42. Clever idea to replace verm with Carroll. Lol, don’t know what’s worse at west ham, is it their attack or defense???

    We owe fat Sam a favour, we should give him Park

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  43. Hahahahahahaaha… This cracked me up :)))))

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  44. IF this is true, that’s funny. Big Sam would play TV5 upfront, since he’s a better finisher than Andy Carroll and scores more goals.

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