Szciggy pays for tar

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Both the Mirror and the Guardian report this morning that Wojciech Szczesny has been slapped with a big fine after he was caught smoking in the showers at Saint Mary’s in the aftermath of his disastrous performance during the 2-0 defeat against Southampton.

On one level it’s so ridiculous, it’s almost hilarious. But it would appear to indicate a more serious issue. Something has gone seriously bong.

Getting caught with a cheeky grout in your gob while you’re pretending to be Hugh Heffner on a night out at Chinawhite is one thing, thinking you can get away with such behaviour under the nose of the management team and your fellow teammates is quite another.

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But then, maybe getting caught was the point? Perhaps it was a self-destructive John Bender-esque display of petulance at the end of a bad day highlighting the troubles of a guy who is probably not the cock-sure character he enjoys playing in public.

Either way it appears to have been the straw that broke the Camel’s back. For his cheeky puff on a Benszczon and Szczedges, his Szilk Cut moment, his lighting up of a Lucky Sztrike, his Szczigarette, his Sznout…he’ll be filling Per Mertesacker’s fine jar with an extra £20,000.

You can’t help but feel he deserves it. All eyes now turn to Sunday and whether Davidoffspina continues in goal against Stogie City.

For what it’s worth, Arsenal denied yesterday that Szczesny’s indiscipline, as publicised by ex-Gunner John Jensen, stretches further than this incident.

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