Report: Arsenal 1-5 Bayern Munich (inc goal!)

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Arsenal: Ospina, Bellerin, Mustafi, Koscielny, Monreal, Xhaka, Ramsey, Oxlade-Chamberlain, Welbeck, Walcott, Alexis

Subs: Cech, Gibbs, Gabriel, Coquelin, Ozil, Lucas, Giroud

Arsenal were embarrassed again after a harsh red card awarded to Laurent Koscielny was the beginning of a 5-1 dismal capitulation against Bayern Munich at the Emirates tonight.

Arsene Wenger made a number of changes to the team that lost to Liverpool on Saturday, with David Ospina, Aaron Ramsey, Theo Walcott, and Alexis Sanchez coming into the starting line-up. However, there was a pre-game blow when Danny Welbeck picked up an injury in the warm-up and was replaced by Olivier Giroud.

The game began as the last one left off, with Bayern dominating possession, and the first shot of the game came from Arjen Robben but it was deflected wide by Monreal. From the resulting corner Alaba shot beyond the far post.

At the other end Walcott found himself one on one with Neuer but his first touch from the through ball was poor and the Bayern keeper got there first. Giroud saw a header bounce just wide off the head of Matts Hummels, and Alexis and Walcott almost combined to fashion a chance as Arsenal enjoyed a promising spell.

That spell bore some fruit too as Walcott opened the scoring in the 20th minute. He picked it up from a Bellerin throw, went towards goal, got a bit of luck to get beyond the defenders into the box, and from a tight angle he absolutely smashed it beyond Neuer into the roof of the net. 1-0.

Ospina had to be smart to come out and block an onside Lewandowski who beat the trap from a quick free kick, but it was the Gunners who were making the most of the game.

There was controversy in the 33rd minute when Xabi Alonso clearly fouled Walcott in the box, right in front of the official behind the line, but the very obvious penalty was not awarded.

The England international was then found by Mustafi in a similar position from where he opened the scoring, but this time could only slam his shot into the side netting.

At the other end a great run from Robben saw Lewandowski with just Ospina to beat, but he miskicked his shot wide from just yards out. Walcott and Alaba picked up yellow cards for a coming together, before the referee ignored a studs up challenge from Vidal on the knee of Sanchez.

The Chilean hit a 30 yard free kick on target but into the arms of the keeper, but it was a positive first 45 minutes for Arsene Wenger’s team and they took the lead into the break.

There were no changes by either manager as the second period began, and Arsenal had the first chance when Ramsey provided a lovely cross for Giroud. The French international just got under the ball though, and his header directed towards the far corner went over.

Moments later Bayern had the ball in the net but Hummels was offside when the free kick was taken. It didn’t matter though as the referee that failed to give Arsenal a penalty in the first half awarded one to Bayern in the 53rd minute.

Koscielny was adjudged to have fouled Lewandowski in the box and the official pointed to the spot and showed a yellow card to the Arsenal captain. Then, he changed his mind, seemingly on the advice of the official behind the goal who denied us a first half penalty, and issued a straight red leaving Arsenal with 10 men.

The Polish international stepped up to put home the penalty and equalise on the night, and making it 6-2 on aggregate. I had earlier come to the conclusion that the referee was a massive prick and I think it’s fair to say that he is such a prick that he’s probably a dolphin in a human suit.

Oxlade-Chamberlain was booked for a Bayern player diving over his leg as the ref continued to display his prickishness, before Ospina had to make a good save from Lewandowski.

Robben scored after getting a number of breaks along the way, surprisingly none of which involved the referee impeding Arsenal players like a goddam linebacker, but some sadly due to Alexis not defending very well, and he made it 2-1 to the visitors. All the fire had gone out of the Gunners since the red card.

Arsene Wenger made a triple change, sending Coquelin, Ozil and Lucas on, for Ramsey, Giroud, and Alexis in the 72nd minute.

The referee continued to ignore fouls by Bayern players, and Costa scored in the 78th minute to make it 3-1 as Arsenal were wide open at the back. Vidal scored a minute later to make it 4-1 after a poor pass from Mustafi.

It was, frankly, like coming home to see Phil Collins having sex with your puppy. I’m not saying he does that, I mean I don’t know for sure, I’m just imagining a horrible scenario and this was pretty horrible.

It was made worse by an offside goal to make it 5-1 to Bayern.

Bellerin shot wide late on, but in the end it was an awful night, and the heaviest defeat ever at the Emirates.

Sad times folks.

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