Saturday, December 3, 2022

Report: Arsenal 3-1 Stoke (inc goals)

Arsenal: Cech, Gabriel, Mustafi, Koscielny, Monreal, Xhaka, Coquelin, Ozil, Oxlade-Chamberlain, Walcott, Alexis

Subs: Ospina, Gibbs, Bellerin, Elneny, Iwobi, Lucas, Giroud

Arsenal moved to the top of the Premier League after a 3-1 win over Stoke at the Emirates this afternoon.

Arsene Wenger made a number of changes from that beat Basel 4-1 in midweek, recalling Petr Cech, Shkodran Mustafi, Nacho Monreal, Francis Coquelin, Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain and Theo Walcott to the starting XI.

The visitors had the first real attempt when Muniesa volleyed a cleared corner back towards goal, but Cech was on hand to tip the ball over. There was danger too from Shaqiri who found himself free on the penalty spot, but took a heavy touch and found himself crowded out.

Good work between Ozil and Alexis saw a Walcott shot blocked, and the England man forced a good save from the keeper after Mustafi provided him a chance which he took from a tight angle.

Joe Allen was wasteful in the 23rd minute, shooting wide when Arnautovic set him up well, before Arsenal were forced into an early change a minute later. Mustafi picked up a hamstring strain and was replaced by the returning Hector Bellerin.

If that was a blow, so too was the concession of a penalty in the 27th minute. Xhaka and Allen contested a ball in the box, the Arsenal man caught his opponent with an elbow that looked completely accidental but referee Lee Mason pointed to the spot because he’s a big useless twat.

After Allen had had some minutes of treatment, Charlie Adam stepped up to score and make it 0-1.

Arsenal looked to respond, and a low Bellerin shot almost deflected to Ozil for a tap-in, but Diouf made a brilliant intervention to poke the ball over the bar before the German could equalise.

Arnautovic found space in the box but a brilliant block from Monreal denied Stoke a second goal, and its importance was made obvious when we equalised just a minute later.

Arsenal worked it really well from midfield, Alexis sent Bellerin free down the right, his low cross to the near post was poked home superbly by Theo Walcott who got his 10th goal of the season. 1-1.

It seemed to bring some life back into Arsenal’s play, with Alexis shooting over, and Bellerin creating a good chance for Oxlade-Chamberlain which he couldn’t keep down. It meant the teams went in level at the break.

There were no changes as the second half began, and Arsenal showed some early intent setting Bellerin free down the right, but lashed a shot over when he should have crossed.

After an injury stoppage for a Stoke player, the Gunners went ahead, taking advantage of some defensive disorganisation from the visitors. Oxlade-Chamberlain lofted in a cross behind the Stoke defence, Ozil ran from deep, got there and looped a header over the keeper to make it 2-1.

Xhaka dragged a shot wide as we looked to extend the lead, Oxlade-Chamberlain worked a shooting position well but saw the keeper equal to it, and great play from Alexis helped keep Arsenal’s momentum going.

At the other end Diouf headed well wide when he really should have tested Cech, before Arsene Wenger made his second change of the day, bringing on Alex Iwobi for Oxlade-Chamberlain.

Stoke sent on Peter Crouch for Diouf in the 73rd minute and he almost had an immediate impact, heading on target from a corner, but Cech made a good save low down on his line.

Once more, Arsenal punished them almost straight away, as Iwobi extend the lead. He played a one-two with Alexis, the Chilean was tripped on the edge of the box but the referee – to his credit for once, the lumpy wombat-headed cockblister – waved play on, Iwobi took it into the box and curled a low shot beyond the keeper to make it 3-1.

Stoke took off Charlie Adam, presumably because with him and Shaqiri on the pitch they were well over Premier League weight regulations. Arsenal brought on Giroud for Alexis, before Shaqiri then got taken off himself, making Lee Mason the fattest man on the pitch.

Walcott saw a shot well saved by the Stoke keeper, but Arsenal were in complete control once the two goal lead was established. Stoke offered little, and the Gunners win means they go top of the table ahead of Chelsea’s game against West Brom tomorrow.

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Xhaka with another midfield masterclass. Such a class player.

Santa is indeed a gooner.


Top of the league. most goals scored currently and third best defence.

Hope Mustafi not out too long though.


Come on Leicester, you can score 3 at home too (like all the other home sides today).


Leicester is 2 up!


2 Already (after 5 mins)


Now 3 🙂


They’re 2-0 up already so gotta give them an A for effort


CB – what black magic did you weave??

Xhaquelin Kostafi

Next challenge?


Chel$ki look like they’re in a state of shock. About time Leicester woke up.

Sheffield Goon

I’m worried about our decline in recent form. 5 against West Ham, 4 in mid-week, and just the 3 today.

What the hell’s going on?

Viva la Prof

Spiralling out of control


Wenger out!


I wouldn’t mind if we beat Everton 2-1 and beat city 1-0 tho’…

Gutbukkit Deffrolla

Shoot Xhaka-laka-laka Shoot
Shoot Xhaka-laka-laka Shoot

Gutbukkit Deffrolla

We could stretch that out a bit maybe? 🙂


Some of his long passes were beyond belief. Can’t wait to watch the inevitable Xhaka vs Stoke video.


I thank them for scoring early! Could have been a boring game otherwise!!

At peace! Let me watch other top teams screwing it up!


fucking goal zone or goal rush or whatever the fuck it is….made me miss iwobi’s goal because they were showing me scenes from hull v crystal friggin palace.


Top of the table!!

Coq au Vin

And the league!


Walcott will get his new coffee maker then? 🙂


She should make a bigger challenge so Theo can score more. 😀


But one swallow doesn’t make a season


Or a baby.

I’ll get my coat.


Off you go back to Mordor Mark you gurning twat.
Bellerin the best right back in Europe.


Aha! So top of the league in December. What a nice place to be.

As an aside, is there any example of another matchup that depends so much on the venue? They just can’t seem to beat us at the Emirates and we just hate the sight of their disgusting ground.


Apols to fans of Ramsey, but that midfield duo just worked beautifully, penalty notwithstanding. Coquelin made so many great interceptions and some of Xhaka’s long passes were jaw droppingly good.
The strength of our bench was amazing today – Bellerin came on and changed the tone of the game and then Iwobi replacing the (excellent) Ox and scoring. Just wow.
Just need Gabriel/Holding to step up in Mustafi’s absence now, the only worry.

Sheffield Goon

Hopefully Per back soon too.


Can’t play a high line with Mr Per.
Also, that statement about signing Xhaka and only a few kids has come back to haunt him.
He’s not getting in ahead of Mustafi, Gabriel, maybe Holding.

Bob Davis

Great to see us winning. A mature performance. Really happy for Iwobi. I hope he continues to score.



Getting extremely tired by Goal Rush’s shit now…missed Iwobi’s goal. Really unnecessary interruptions almost minute by minute.

Bergkamp 3:16

Couldn’t agree with you more on that one. It’s a seriously shit idea and should be scrapped.


Charlie Adam chose to stamp on Alexis leading to him not noticing iwobi nicking the ball who went on to score. Full Karma will be achieved when he’s retroactively suspended for being dumb.


Great game once again, i am impressed with the team performances in the last games
Can’t discover any weakness right now, let’s keep it that way

Gutbukkit Deffrolla

No No No!! We’re going backwards. We’re getting worse!


What a terrible trend!!



Gutbukkit Deffrolla

😉 (Sorry, didn’t make myself clear)

Godfrey Twatschloch

We’ll never beat giants like West Brom if we continue this trend.


The whole team pressing and defending coupled with the enormous amount of skill within this team is what makes me think we could win the Prem…COYG!

bob davis

Great to see us winning. A mature performance. Really happy for Iwobi. I hope he continues to score.

Just have to keep the momentum going!



Top of the table (for 24 hours at least) on goal difference feels so good!


The face on Stoke player after Mezuts goal. Priceless, fucking Priceless.

Gudang Bedil

And their keeper, besides some of his great saves, is a twat.

kuro kari

That c*nt Charlie Adam stamped on Alexis in the move for the iwobi goal. That orc c*nt.

Getso gunner

Well deserved win


Really wanted Giroud to get a goal.


that ozil goal was such a beauty 🙂
as the commentator on my stream said too, it looked like it was in slow motion 🙂

Fireman Sam

Wizard of Ozil, he’s the SloMo king


Who floored Charlie Adam early in the game? Dunno why I found it funny.


Great result, great goals!

Just saw a replay, but I thought I saw Adam try and stamp on Alexis before Iwobi finished the third goal. Hope he was unhurt from such cuntish behaviour!


It looks like he might have.

On the Arsanalist clip, its only clear in the last replay. But if he did it, it was deliberate


Did anyone else see that cunt-faced Charlie Adam stepping on Alexis during the build-up of the third goal? He did that on purpose. What a fucking obese fuck twat. I hope Alexis is fine. I was fuming when I saw it and I’m pretty sure that’s why Wenger took him off.


Pretty sure mason saw it, and did nothing.


When’s Theo gonna release ‘TJ and the coffee machine’?


Bellerin is incredible, Ozil and Alexis are indispensable, Arsenal right now is unplayable. I am loving the team spirit, long may it continue.

Make mine a Swiss miss

Good win, top of the league. Header from Ozil and 2 in 2 for Iwobi, great for him and great for me 🙂

Almost makes me benevolent enough to forgive the ref, but he’s a tubby little turd so i won’t.


Great comeback win! Think the Mustafi injury is a worry not because I doubt Gabriel’s ability but Mustafi is a composed organizer. Quite a few times I’ve seen him call out to the others on the back four to watch the line(offside trap), tell them to move up right after an attack is cleared etc. Kos and Gabriel are more all action defenders. Great to see Walcott involved and finishing again. Grats on the coffeemaker 😀


Great team performance that, probably our best pressing this season. Xhaka Alonso did it again, really unlucky with the pen but a classy performance throughout. Walcott looked back to his best alongside Bellerin when he came on, they just seem to get each other and it’s great to see these little partnerships popping up throughout the side. Iwobi was excellent too, very confident. Motm will be tricky, tempted to give it to Xhaka but I’m passing it Bellerin’s way. To come back from such a long lay-off and perform like that is sensational really


well the problem for the opposition when walcott and bellerin are playing together is that the defense can mark one of them with two players because they now the other will go torugh the flank and they now as much as walcott is dangerous bellerin is too, the reason is working so well is because walcott knows as soon as bellerin is released free on the flank like when alexis passed him trough, walcott is cutting inside and playing as a second striker in the box an I saw that many times this season. and I’m sure it is a… Read more »


It’s not just that Walcott is making those second striker runs, he’s also taking more right attacking mid positions too. He’s making more positive passes and looking to take people on with his dribbling, probably because of the space Bellerin creates and where Walcott gets the ball from him.


It’s a pleasure to watch this current team plays. ?


We beat a stoke team with 12 men today, Lee mason almost proved the difference for the visitors. I had the unfortunate ‘pleasure’ of listening to Tony gale on nbcsn (how he and Stewart Robson continue to get work baffles me as they offer nothing to the commentary)- and he said that xhaka committed a ‘clear foul’ for the penalty, but in the second half when Allen tried to do much the same thing and elbow one of our players it was ‘strong and not a foul.’ Good win today, if not a ‘fuck you win,’ to our title rivals-… Read more »

A Different George

Don’t agree about Gale, who I think appreciates good football, often points out runs off the ball (including off-camera runs) and, perhaps most important, usually refers to us as “the Arsenal.” Secret Gooner.


I don’t know what you’re on about, but Tony Gale is a former West Ham player if I’m right and doesn’t like Arsenal. He had no choice but to praise Arsenal today because we’re too good now.


Tony Gale is one of the few exceptions to the rule that we should respect anyone who calls us “The” Arsenal.


Commentators better than Tony gale include, but are not limited to:
Michael Owen
Both redknapps
Robbie savage
Jamie carragher
Glenn hoddle
Tim Howard
Warren barton

The only person I’d put as worse than Tony gale is Stewart robson.


Walcott had a very good game – Pieters couldn’t live with him. Well taken goal and only the keeper stopped his hat-trick. And Xhaka more than made up for the penalty with an imperious display. Good to see Ox getting his confidence back (great assist for Mesut) and that goal for Iwobi won’t hurt a bit (except Mark Hughes). How many miles does Mesut run in a game? I can’t understand these accusations of anonymity – he’s running around like crazy, closing opponents down when they have the ball and finding space when we win it. Give him the money,… Read more »


Hahaha man city

Glory hunter

Great team performance again
Sanchez look absolutely dejected when subbed off ???


Convincing. And seeing Mark Hughes lose and being his usual twat, even better!


Watch hughes’ press conference for more hilarity- he refuses to condemn stoke orcs for their reprehensible Aaron ramsey chant.
As Alan Davies once said- in stoke, they boo the sick.

Dial Square

Seems like strength in depth at last, our subs are making serious impacts this season, Ballerina with an assist and Iwobi with a stunning piece of trickery, dynamism and technique to round off the goal difference.
Brilliant performance
Up The Arsenal


Leicester 3 up against Man City!


Watching the game in a Paris bar bumped into some local Gooners… always pleasant…stayed on for the Leicester v Man City game and I’m having a whale of fucking time… 2nd bottle of claret…COYG!

Alexis dog..

Never seen us this convincing in terms of us winning the league since the invincibles.


Every home team scored 3 today.
ManC and PepG relishing premiere league hahaha


What a joy to watch.
The pen was a bit worrying but the team reaction is fantastic, kept pressing forward and maintained a good spirit.
It is also great to see how Ozil celebrated his goal. Looked truly happy unlike what he used to be. Is it a good sign by any chance? 😉
I’d also say Walcott, Ox and Xhaka are outstanding today.



I thought Coquelin was immense today with his countless interceptions

Dan D

Granit was given a 5 0n the sky sports app. Scandalous rating, him and Coq were superb.

Felt like I was watching a very, very good team today who upped it when they needed to.

Pressing in the 2nd half was fantastic too.

Felt to me today if they had of got a 2nd we would have scored again.

In summary, I’m very encouraged by that today, not at our best for spells but top draw at other times. And had too much for Stoke.

Oh and Petr Czech, rubbish at penalties. Really rubbish.


Penalties are a lot of hardwork to be honest. My brother is a GK and even at high school and uni level just for penalties he had a lot of homework watching tonnes of film and studying how other players took their penalties and such. He says that, as a goalie, in his opinion, from watching them, the only two players who hit unstoppable penalties are Gerrard and Ronaldo. Gerrard is famous for hitting his penalties into one corner and Ronaldo never gambles. Almost always in the corner.


We should send Cech to spring training in the MLB for some infield drills at third base.


On way back from the game. What a vile bunch of twats the Stoke supporters are. Lovely Ramsey chant. If being a complete cunt of an Orc is indeed ‘lovely’…

Agreed that it was a big ‘fuck you’ win. Xhaka was immense; penalty was other side from us but it looked at best innocuous. Confusion for me on the third goal since I was still looking at Sanchez on the deck!

Convincing performance all round. Shouldn’t get carried away, but will. Bring on Everton. If we can go into next Sunday with the run going…


As I mentioned yesterday, all these people who called for Lucas to start do not understand we play a game almost every 3 to 4 days. Rotation and efficiency is key. Lucas did well at Basel but its early days and it doesn’t mean he will repeat the trick the next game in just 3 days or 4 down. Ditto Alexis. He scores a hattrick but it doesn’t mean he will be fining the net the next game (which means we have to have options like GIroud and Lucas etc also hot and firing) In this case, I mentioned both… Read more »

Heavy infantry

Well done lads for coming back strong from a goal down !! Fun fact: Cech hasn’t saved a single penalty this season…

atracción secundaria lucas perez

Marc Muniesa’s look of forlorn butthurt after the ozil header was delightful.


In my opinion it’s worth having a crap referee like today if it’s going to elicit descriptions as good as “lumpy wombat-headed cockblister”. I’m now contemplating which of my colleagues will receive this insult on Monday.

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